Many of us have a profile on facebook, including me. I'm not quite as active as some people are, but I do try to update my status and keep up to date on what is going on in my friends' lives. A few of them have really gotten into facebook, and I've found it's the only way to keep in touch with them anymore since their e-mail accounts seem to be non-existent.
But what I'm really curious about is how do you choose who is your "friend" on facebook? Everyone's definition of "friend" is different, and I would presume on facebook, it may not be as conventional since it is a social networking site.
For me, when someone adds me as their friend, there has to be some personal connection with them. I've never denied anyone who has asked me, since it is usually someone who I know well, went to high school with, grew up with, etc. Though even with my college, high school/childhood classmates, I am often interested in who chooses whom to be their "friends." On a few occasions, I found someone who I went to elementary school with, and e-mailed them first. Some included me as their "friend," others did not.
So herein lies my dilemma. And it is probably incredibly corny and juvenile. Yesterday, this guy from high school added me as his "friend." I was quite surprised to see this, despite the fact that we have several mutual friends. This was a guy who I dated in my early years of high school. We went to a winter dance together and was supposed to go to prom together, but he wound up going with someone else. That really upset me, especially since everyone kept saying he was going to ask me. I went to prom alone that year, but that's okay, because I was on prom committee, so I handled the decorations and all.
Eventually, I got over being dumped and actually decided I did not like the guy anymore. It wasn't, because he dumped me but more that he had changed. In his junior year, he ran for student government and became elected president. He was no longer the charming, sweet, sensitive guy I knew, but rather turned into just "one of the crowd," finally gaining his acceptance into popularity. He went from being drama boy to student elected government president. It seriously changed him, and we never connected again.
I guess my dilemma is whether to add him as my friend even though I guess I could say I'm holding a small grudge. I don't have any interest in him in terms of "boyfriend" or playing out the "would have" scenario, but I do hold a little curiosity in what was going through his head at that time. Besides, even if I was interested in him, I found out he recently came out of the closet. This reminds me, another crush I had in elementary school, apparently is also gay now too. I guess I'm 0 for 2 in the department of childhood crushes.
If you're interested, here are several samplings of studies/articles about facebook:
Facebook friends=poor adjustment
Facebook benefits extroverts most
Want to win friends and influence people? Use facebook and IMs
Number of friends on Facebook and Narcissism