Monday, December 8, 2008

Random Monday musings

Today has been an interesting day to say the least.

  • I went to the fitness center early this morning. (I only go twice a week) I noticed an older man on the treadmill and thought "damn, he's going pretty fast. He's huffing and puffing too, I hope he is okay." It turned out to be my lawyer!
  • I also saw that woman again. Readers can be referred to the post about why I don't do gyms. Luckily, it was right when I was leaving, so she didn't disrupt my workout. I guess she likes to come on Mondays as well.
  • My therapy appt. was a bit off kilter. I found myself being defensive which is rare in therapy. More on that in another post. I left the appt. with high anxiety, again something that normally does not happen. It was the type of anxiety where your heart flutters, shakiness occurs, and there are no clear thoughts.
  • While browsing stores, I noticed jeans hung sideways. Is this a new trend?
  • I got suckered into getting a Sears card when all I wanted was a new Hepa filter. It was free, and I really don't shop at Sears much, but I figure if I can get free Hepa filters, hey why not?
  • I learned one of the pharmacists at the pharmacy apparently knows me by name. As I was going to the check out counter, she handed the other pharmacist my refill and Tetrix hand creme, therefore, he never even had to ask my name. This pharmacist is also the same one I saw a few weeks ago in another store whom I recognized by her "perky" voice. Perky is okay but too perky leaves me with questions.
  • Two encounters with people staring at my hand. One was a cashier who politely asked what happened to it. I told him, and then, he said "we all need a little blessing." Umm okay.
  • However, the weird experience was at the library. I went to pick up a book on hold and decided to go to the bathroom on my way out. This little African-American girl, maybe 7 or 8 years old? stops me teary-eyed and says, "Excuse me, but can you take me back to station 10?" I replied with, "Yes, is that where you were?" Then, suddenly she saw my right hand. Her eyes got very big and she started to back away. I told her it was okay and asked if she wanted me to help her. She said no and bolted. :sigh: I have not had one of those kind of moments in a very long time. It made me feel so sad not only because of one of my "flaws" but also that she became afraid out of ignorance.
Just think, this is only Monday. What will the rest of the week have in store for me?

*Side note. I really don't have a problem talking about my hand. It's a rare condition most don't know anything about, so there are no qualms in educating others. I still get self conscious of it at times, and I know it is one factor for my body image issues. With that said, I have accepted it as it is. I talk about this condition briefly in this
post.

4 comments:

Lisa said...

Sorry about the staring issues. Having time to get used to it doesn't mean it never stings.

And I'm also sorry about the Sears card. I'm a seasonal employee at a nearby Sears, and they're putting the pressure on associates to get as many credit applications ("apps") as we can. Never mind that this is one of the worst times in the last decade to ask people to get a credit card.

ramona said...

This really does sound like a rough Monday!
I find myself hyper-aware of my appearance around children, especially the dark circles under my eyes. Should I encounter a child when I'm especially tired or not wearing makeup, I try not to let them notice me. Because if they look at me and get scared or upset, I almost want to cry along with them.

Gaining Back My Life said...

I understand about the staring issues....I have kids ask me all the time now, "What's wrong with your face?"

I wish they could understand if I told them.

Tiptoe said...

Thanks for sharing everyone. I think what was the worst was the little girls' utter sheer look of terror on her face, like I was some monster or something!

Lisa, it's okay. I won't hold it against you being a seasonal Sears employee ;-)

Ramona, do understand. Our emotions can get wrapped up easily in seeing how someone else may view us.

GBML, so sorry that kids are staring. Maybe you can have a good comeback, tell some exotic story?