Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Feeling teary

I do not have much time to write, so I'm going to make this really brief.

A quick update: The coffee invitation fell through, and I never heard from her. I figured this would be the case, but I had hoped maybe she would act differently. There was no response whatsoever.

Yesterday, I walked in, casually asked how her weekend was, received a cold answer of "I worked all weekend." Then I said, "I really hope we can chat soon." She went on to give me a schedule she wanted me to follow for daycare for several days this week--fine. I reiterated what I had said adding in that "it would be good to clear the air. If I need to schedule an appointment with you, then fine." She said she would schedule something for later this week. And that was that.

How did I feel afterwards? Better? Well not really actually. It's more about how do I want to approach the situation. One parent offers advice in one way, another says something different.

I'm not sure what to do other than to make a list and feel prepared.

I've held back many tears but today I'm just feeling teary about the whole situation. It won't last but for today it is what it is--simply a sad, stressful situation with many things to consider.


Cammy said...

I'm really sorry you have to deal with this. Like I said the other day, you truly deserve to be treated so much better. You're a big asset to her and she's not giving you the respect you deserve. Hang in there, I hope it clears up soon. <3

I Hate to Weight said...

her behavior is so frustrating and may i say, rude.

sounds like you've handled it well, asking for time and in a gentle way.

my only thoughts - when you do talk to her, don't make her defensive. use lots of affirming statements -- "i know we're really busy and this is a tough time of year. i wanted to make sure i'm doing everything i can to make things run smoothly. i'm sensing...."

you probably know all this, but this is what i try to do when approaching unpleasantless


ola said...

I just don't understand this behaivour :( Everyone has their issues - maybe she has some trouble going on right now and it is not directly about you (although I still don't understand it, even in my worst antisocial anorexic state I wouldn't treat someone like that).

I hope something/someone will make your eyes all happy and shiny, because it is what you deserve!

Sarah said...

You already know my thoughts on this. You are doing the right thing by continuing to be respectful, but remember that ultimately the party you need to respect most is you. Draw your line in the sand of what you will and won't take in a job situation, then stick to it. I'm so sorry this has to be so hard. Like C said, she really doesn't realize what she has...

Tiptoe said...

Everyone, thanks for your comments of support. It felt really good to read your responses.

Cammy, thank you as always for helping me out when I need it. So appreciated.

Melissa, I'll likely be diplomatic, because that is always how I am, however, there are a few direct questions I'd really like answers to--that to me feel valid in asking.

I think one thing I am afraid of is that even if I take the approach of being diplomatic, what if I get back in the cornered?

I'll e-mail you soon.

Ola, it is certainly true she may have something else going on that in unrelated to me. But still you'd think there would be some communication.

Sarah, you are right that I do need to think about myself first. It's never easy for someone who puts everyones else's needs before my own, but I am reminding myself that I do not want to be miserable forever.