Cammy has inspired me to go on match.com. Actually, I was on it a long time ago in my early-mid twenties but didn't have a huge amount of success with it and went on other sites for awhile. Some of you may remember awhile back, I mentioned KH and going out on a date with him. We corresponded since then, but it just seemed to fizzle out. I don't know whether he was looking for something different, I wasn't what he expected, etc. The correspondences we've had have all been brief with a good amount of time in between. I take a cue from there and move on. It's not a huge loss as I hadn't invested a lot into the relationship, and I figure there must be someone better out there for me.
I put my profile up on match this afternoon. Since I was on my netbook which has no pictures of myself nor hardly any pictures at all, I waited to upload one from my desktop. Then, this evening, much to my surprise someone already "winked" at me and sent me an e-mail. Seriously, my profile is pretty bare bones compared to some of the novels on other people's profiles, so I really did not expect any hits whatsoever. I know bad Tiptoe, you're already just self-sabotaging yourself!
Now, I'm debating whether to put a picture up. I think it would be a very fun experiment to see how many people read my profile and/or winked or e-mailed me. This way, there is nothing based on superficial-ism, though of course I know the rate is low statistically in finding someone when there is no profile picture. Anyone, however, who is looking at my profile does know my ethnicity, and honestly, I think a lot of people have a stereotypical view of what an Asian woman looks like, though of course there are many differences.
The bad thing with all this is that whoever may e-mail me, I have to subscribe to view it. Then, there could be the weird question of why I had no picture up. That could lead to awkwardness in saying this was an experiment. Of course, there is always the option of e-mailing them my picture later.
So, what are people's thoughts? I'll probably make another poll of this just because I think it's a fun way to interact with my blogger readers.
Note: *Just in the span of writing this e-mail, I had another "wink." I'm also not really insecure in terms of a pic being up or not, I have at any other dating site I've joined. I'm just really curious if this would work or not. Even though I know physical chemistry is a fact of life and there has to be some of that to make some connection, I guess I get tired of that being what is the first or only thing someone sees. I'd rather make a good first impression by my personality than on my face alone.
5 comments:
I was only active on there for about a month, and from what I gathered a lot of people do a trial or "experiment", because most are skeptical about online dating (I sure was). So I don't think there'd be any harm in telling people you were just toying around and hadn't put a pic up yet. To review my experience on there, I was very skeptical going in but was curious enough to subscribe for on a trial basis. I saw some sleaze, but some nice guys also. I am unfortunately near a military base, so a ton of my "matches" were from there. I had a couplefew dates, but met one guy in my town that I immediately hit it off with, who became my current bf, and the rest is history now. Overall the experience was interesting, as I had no expectations going in, was just curious more than anything. I never considered myself the "online dating type", but wanted some way to meet new people when I moved here a few months ago. Match.com is good about privacy and CLOSELY monitors content that goes on the profiles for suspicious/inappropriate material. I am looking forward to hearing how this goes for you!
i hate being judged by my looks. that being said, i think there really is something about having a physical chemistry with people too.
my boyfriend (i met him when i was 44. really he is the first nice guy i've dated) has the sparkliest eyes, the sweetest chubby cheek and the nicest, cheeriest smile. when i met him (and later asked him out!) i liked his personality, but his eyes told me there was a lot more there.
i'm rambling. when i was looking at match.com, i was going to post a picture, much as i hated the idea.
hope you don't mind that opinion.
I've always said that if I was single, I would do online dating. I'm someone who likes some time to get to know a person, and through writing first is easiest for me. I feel like the alternative way to meet people is the conventional party or bar scene. It seems like online dating allows for more weeding through people with whom you're not compatible. I think it'll be exciting! Good luck :) Keep us posted!
After Cammy posted about her success with match.com I too started checking it out. So far I've been too chicken to do much with it, but I do like the idea of getting to read about someone before meeting them (like Kim was talking about).
I say go for it! As to the picture, maybe wait a couple of weeks and then decide once you've got a sense of who contacts you without a picture.
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