My dad recently came to visit me this past weekend. Overall, the visit went okay. It seems as long as he is not asking too much about my future plans or mentioning graduate or medical school, things seem to be fairly kosher. Back in October, he set a new record of talking about these topics 15 times in a 4-5 day period. Now, his new record for less mentioning of these topics is 6 months. I never hold my breath entirely that he will just stop talking about it, but it does seem there is some behavioral change which has all around helped our relationship.
As my parents like to do when they come visit me, we went grocery shopping. They just continue to think I do not have enough in my fridge, freezer, and pantry. Now, I have a whole house full to feed an army! Gah, it's a little intimidating.
Since Luna and Clif bars were on sale at Whole Foods, I did buy a good number of them. When we got home, here is how our conversation went:
Dad: You know those Luna bars you eat have a lot of calories.
Me: Umm, no, not really. Why do you think that?
Dad: Well, just look at the label. Those things are small.
Me: Yes, but if you read the label, there is protein, carbs, and fat, all things your body needs.
Dad: Why can't you just eat a candy bar?
Back in high school and college, I would never have touched an energy bar, because of the calorie count. In my freshman year of college, my mom became worried about me and decided to send a whole bunch of energy bars. At this time, the options were not as vast as now, and the bars did not taste very good. In protest, I took one bite out of each one, proclaiming I had tried them all (technically yes but not exactly what she wanted to hear) and hated them. I vowed never to touch one again.
I don't remember when I started eating them or why. For several years, they became the staple of my breakfast, and the only thing I would eat. Today, I literally only use them as snacks or eat something else along with them as a breakfast.
The post isn't just about eating energy bars, it's more a reminder of how my thinking and behaviors have changed. It also gives me a good alarm bell in gauging if I'm ever headed downhill in that I would retreat back to thinking how Luna bars or any other energy bars had too many calories. (Kim wrote a good post on knowing when you're in relapse)
I'm still not to the point of just eating a candy bar and don't know if I ever really will as candy bars have never been my thing, but that's okay. There are still other goals to reach beyond just energy bars, but it is one step on the staircase.
8 comments:
Energy bars...candy bars...apples...oranges... That's my opinion :) I prefer to eat a Luna bar over a Snickers bar, but every now and then I get a weird craving for a Snickers bar and I usually have one (or at least a couple Snickers bites). I'm tired of being so hard on myself for not eating "normal." What's "normal"? If you're eating enough, who cares if it's a Luna bar or a Snickers? It's not going to interfere your life, in most cases... I think acceptance of where we're at with food choices diminishes the self-beating, ya know?
There was a time when I wouldn't touch a prepackaged thing like a Luna Bar because of the calories. It had to be within a safe size/calorie ratio. It's funny now that you mention it, because I eat them a lot as snacks now. I lived off Clif bars when I was hypermetabolic because they were so nutritious.
Ah, family.
I will share with you a conversation I had with my father over spring break. We had just seen one of my high school teachers, who of course did not recognize me.
Me: Well, the last time he saw me I was 20 pounds lighter and had long hair.
Dad: ... when did you gain 20 pounds?
He tries, he really does. I just would have thought that the hefty therapy bill would have been a reminder.
Kim, you are right that we need to stop berating ourselves over our food choices. There are times when I am in the mood for something like the snickers bite size bar, but yet still have to think about it. Getting there, slowly but surely.
JEI, I agree Clif bars are delicious. I found the small size ones awhile back and found them to have even more flavor than the others. They really do provide well as just snacks.
Lisa, it does sound like your dad was trying. I didn't mention it here, but my father kept saying how great I looked and how I must weigh only X. And really, I'm probably at the high end of my weight right now. Feel kind of perplexed about this.
I know parental comments like this can be so frustrating, I'm sorry. I think that sometimes people really just don't *get* it, no matter how much they love us.
And there is no shame in energy bars, the Luna ones are pretty lightweight compared to some of the ones my dietitician has recommended for me. I am guilty about subbing them for meals too, but I guess ANY food or other substance can be used either the wrong or the right way...but anyway, like with all things, the point is not about the food, the point is about being relaxed and confident enough to allow yourself treats and such.
it sounds like you have the confidence to know what's best for you right now. if a Luna bar works for you, great.
i find it hard to make my own decisions and stay confident, in the face of everyone else's "expert" advice. sometimes, when someone's giving me "healthy" eating advice, i tune them out in my head and just hear, "whah, whah, whah, what". sounds terrible, but it's my self-protection.
you're coping a lot more maturely!
I totally understand progress like this, and I think it's okay to eat a Luna bar instead of a Snickers bar if your preferences (vs. fears) are driving it.
That being said, I like Larabars and Kashi TLC bars a lot better :)
Thanks for the comments everyone.
Cammy, yes, these comments can be difficult to hear. I have seen the other energy bars you are talking about but have never had the nerve to actually them.
Lissy, I do try to make my own choices versus someone else's choosing. It can be hard at times, but it gets easier the more you do it.
Sarah, yes, the Kashi ones are good. I've tried s few of the larabars as well. I still get a little hung up on the fat content for one bar though.
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