tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4699361536242687629.post7262338997309746981..comments2023-10-28T04:45:48.353-04:00Comments on Between Living and Existing: So what awaits me at my next therapy appointment?Tiptoehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17388368645986593755noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4699361536242687629.post-77124948933009055132009-01-26T21:42:00.000-05:002009-01-26T21:42:00.000-05:00Everyone, thank you so much for all your support. ...Everyone, thank you so much for all your support. It means a lot to me. I'll be writing an update post to the session and will hopefully answer your questions there and address what's been said.Tiptoehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17388368645986593755noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4699361536242687629.post-84446189741017857552009-01-26T19:09:00.000-05:002009-01-26T19:09:00.000-05:00You are very brave to bring your mom to your sessi...You are very brave to bring your mom to your session. My mother has no idea I'm in therapy. And it's totally not your fault about the insurance, that's the fault of our crappy medical system. Your therapist sounds really good and I hope that you can find a way to make it work out. Anytime you can open up and talk about something shameful it's difficult. I've heard that shame is the hardest emotion to deal with. So if you've found someone who understands and handles it well it would be sad to have to leave her. I hope it works out.Harriethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10151061142781327531noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4699361536242687629.post-78168578712620562932009-01-26T16:18:00.000-05:002009-01-26T16:18:00.000-05:00i was never brave enough to bring my mother to a s...i was never brave enough to bring my mother to a session. good for you! i wonder if you've discussed the experience with her? <BR/><BR/>we do all carry shame. i've had so many "secrets" along the way. some i've shared and found that they're not so ugly. some i've shared, and then changed a behavior (drinking, sedatives, etc.) the latter sharing was NOT easy, but i am a 100% healthier woman. and carry far less shame. You are not alone!<BR/><BR/>it drives me crazy when we're finally ready to take the steps we need, basically, to survive and the insurance company gets in the way. it's hard to believe. do what's best for YOU, when you decide what that is. I hope C. can help you in the process. take care.I Hate to Weighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17241064340434705588noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4699361536242687629.post-34294727751436056332009-01-26T14:24:00.000-05:002009-01-26T14:24:00.000-05:00I sympathise with the therapist situation, it's a ...I sympathise with the therapist situation, it's a really tough call. I was in a similar boat at the end of last year, and nearly accepted my Dad's offer of money, but was lucky enough not to need it in the end. I was always worried that it might make me feel under pressure to "succeed" in therapy if the money was coming from family, but i know they would have been relieved to be doing something.<BR/><BR/>I think taking your Mum to see C was so brave tiptoe. Really, sometimes I am so proud of the ED community on the internet, you are a star.<BR/><BR/>Lola xAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4699361536242687629.post-69496890366625433052009-01-26T11:36:00.000-05:002009-01-26T11:36:00.000-05:00I know what you mean by having that awkward feelin...I know what you mean by having that awkward feeling before a session... What works for me is to just walk in and say, "I feel really weird about being here." Of course, sometimes that is followed by the "please elaborate" silence, but sometimes it opens up a wonderful conversation. Also, shame/guilt is a bitch. It's sad how much we internalize things and beat up on ourselves and blame ourselves for things that are not even remotely our fault, or even within our control (like your paperwork). It sounds like the harsh voices are active today. They'll quiet down... I hope you have a good session. Keep us updated!Kimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12524913753671188764noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4699361536242687629.post-39008200186550062009-01-26T11:35:00.000-05:002009-01-26T11:35:00.000-05:00I just found out that my therapist wants to schedu...I just found out that my therapist wants to schedule an appointment to meet with my mom and me too. Eeeek! I set up the appointment for next week, but I still might chicken out and call the whole thing off. <BR/><BR/>So are you going to stop seeing C after 4 sessions? Are you going to find a new therapist? If you want to stick with C I would encourage you to ask your mom for some financial help if that is possible. I know you feel guilty, but I know that my mom would want to help if I asked her.Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02777608805308517582noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4699361536242687629.post-20866649728335255602009-01-26T09:56:00.000-05:002009-01-26T09:56:00.000-05:00Tiptoe,First of all, I still commend you for wanti...Tiptoe,<BR/><BR/>First of all, I still commend you for wanting your mom to have a part in therapy, even if it's not an "active" role, you wanted her to know where you were. <BR/>Like Cammy said, it's so hard to know (I think) exactly what you want to happen from or to say in therapy. <BR/>Finally, I want to say that I understand quite well that sense of shame and how it makes one shut down, not open up. I wish/hope that you can be kind to yourself and not judge yourself so harshly. <BR/>I hope you have a good session.<BR/>-KristinaKristinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17208374967597840745noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4699361536242687629.post-76021501651791310072009-01-26T09:50:00.000-05:002009-01-26T09:50:00.000-05:00Tiptoe, this was a huge, courageous step. I have ...Tiptoe, this was a huge, courageous step. I have yet to schedule my joint appt with my Mom. But we'll be covering a lifetime of stuff, so it may take longer than just one hour!<BR/><BR/>From how I took the post, it seems as though you are learning to see some things differently...for ex, you went ahead with the appt. with your Mom, knowing full and well they WOULD be discussing you first privately. No matter what goes wrong, I always feel like it's my fault. And it sould you like you feel similar; that's a hurdle we need to jump to fully recover!<BR/><BR/>Also, blaming yourself getting the paperwork filed; you can't shoulder that burden. It's <B>NOT</B> your fault.<BR/><BR/>And if you do have a find a new therapist, well, as I've learned, it's not the end of the world. I was terrified when my t of 10 years left. But I've accomplished more in the past 3 months with my new one than I did in all those years!<BR/><BR/>I'm sorry you're struggling with this right now. You are in my thoughts.<BR/><BR/>Hugs,<BR/>eWrapped up in Lifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18210700542140339831noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4699361536242687629.post-55307570375918779752009-01-26T09:25:00.000-05:002009-01-26T09:25:00.000-05:00Don't be afraid to go into the session not knowing...Don't be afraid to go into the session not knowing what you will feel, because feelings aren't something we can strategize or plan for. And <I>please</I> don't feel guilty about the cost of therapy, the culprit is our crappy medical system, there is no excuse for it being so damn difficult to pay for treating a disease.<BR/><BR/>Remember that C. is a professional, and whatever she thinks about you after talking to your mother is not going to be harsh or judgmental. Take care and try not to be nervous, let us know how things go for you at the session.<BR/>hugs,<BR/>CCammyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18181004571609998125noreply@blogger.com